You're the only light I need (english version)
by A-Kabby-K
Summary: Kabby AU Criminal Minds. Six years have gone by the day the leader of the sect "COL" was arrested by the Behavioral Analysis Unit, directed by Marcus Kane with the help of the criminologist Abigail Griffin. Six years during which everyone thought that this dreadful case was finally over. Six years during which everyone was trying to forget, to piece themselves back together...
1. Chapter 1

Kabby AU (Criminal Minds)

 _Six months have gone by the day the leader of the sect "City of Light" was arrested by the Behavioral Analysis Unit, directed by Marcus Kane with the help of the criminologist Abigail Griffin. Six years during which everyone thought that this dreadful case was finally over. Six years during which everyone was trying to forget, to piece themselves back together, to move forward …_

 _But, the discovery of a body will force them to return into a past whose all the wounds have not yet healed._

This is the translation of my french fic with the same name.

 ** _Thank you so so so much to charmingly-evil & artisan-kom-kabbykru for her help with my english mistakes. _**

**Chapter 1 :**

Nothing seemed to have changed. It was like, even after six years, time had stopped. Only the three letters above the main entrance seemed to have been refreshed, unlike the rest of the frontage.

Although she dreaded coming back here, Abigail Griffin hadn't imagined the brutality with which all the memories she had tried to forget in recent years would come back to her mind.

Her hands tightened around the coffee she was holding and for a while she remained motionless, struggling not to immediately turn away.

" Can I help you? " asked a young man around twenty who was wearing flippantly a backpack on one of his shoulders.

The question made her come back to reality and she shook her head.

"No, no thank you. I've been here before," she replied, trying to smile despite the lump in her throat.

The student nodded slightly. He was about the leave but at the last moment, hesitated, and finally turned back to her.

"You're Abigail Griffin, right? The profiler? " he asked, staring at her.

The woman held back a sigh. She hated being recognized on the street. Since her publisher had decided to add her portrait on the cover of one of her books without telling her, she was frequently accosted by strangers who, sometimes, asked very weird questions.

"Rather doctor of criminology, " she corrected automatically.

No, she wasn't a profiler, at least not in the generally accepted sense of that word . She wasn't the kind of person who could guess the life of one another because of a badly ironed shirt or some messy hair. No. Abigail Griffin did nothing more than analyze the facts in light of sociological, historical, psychological or forensic elements.

She only linked the hundreds of pages of a file. She gave meaning to a broken glass in the middle of a kitchen or to an anomaly in cadaveric rigidity, but in any case, she was able to enter in the killer's mind. To be honest, she had been skeptical about the reliability of this discipline for a very long time. But then, one day, she had pushed this door in front of her… This damned door and all of her skepticism had been put to the test …

"But yes. It's me, " she finally confirmed reluctantly.

A broad smile stretched the student's lips.

"My name is Jasper Jordan, I am student at the Academy. I'm reading one of your books these days. The one about the crimes related to sectarian abuse… I have it with me, do you think you could sign it? " he asked, starting to open his bag without waiting for an answer.

Abby took a step back and shook her head.

"I don't sign autographs, " she said, more coldly than she wanted.

"Excuse me, I'm expected! " she added quickly to end the conversation.

She wanted so badly to run away from this student that, without thinking anymore, she finally found the courage to climb the few stairs to the front door above which was inscribed the acronym for the Federal Bureau of Investigation.

After a quick stop to the security checkpoint, Abby walked to the reception and gave at the receptionist the official papers, which justified her presence here. The young woman offered her a friendly smile and began to type on her computer keyboard.

"Aurora Blake doesn't work here anymore? " Abby asked casually.

The young girl's face, who was named Maya Vie according to her badge, suddenly darkened. She looked up from her screen and gave her a sympathetic look.

"No ma'am … She … She died two years ago. Leukemia. " she said by grimacing slightly.

" Oh ! I … I didn't know, " Abby whispered, shocked.

Even if the two women had known each other a very little time, Abigail kept some very good memories of Aurora Blake. The woman had always been friendly and helpful. Abby was used to stop and exchanged a few words with her before going home when she worked here six years ago. The receptionist was a wonderful woman. She had raised her two children alone and had sacrificed her health to give them a better future.

"What about her son? " she asked with a genuine interest.

"The agent Blake still works here and his sister, Octavia, has officially joined the team! ", Maya informed her, this time, with a grin.

"I can't wait to meet her, " Abby said, which seemed to make the girl in front of her giggle.

"You won't be disappointed," commented Maya with a lower tone, stifling a chuckle, before looking at her screen again.

Abby arched an eyebrow, surprised by the girl's remark, but she remained quiet.

When she met him, Bellamy Blake was still a young agent. A kind of a hothead, but who was, in no doubt, very promising. His sister couldn't possibly be worst than him.

"Everything is in order Doctor Griffin, you can go, " the girl finally told her.

" Thank you, " Abby said before taking back her record and walking toward the elevators.

Once inside, Abby instantly regretted to not having taken the stairs. She pressed the button for the ninth floor and slipped between the other users to go leaning against the back wall. She looked at the screen, which announced the different floors and she tried to focus on the red numbers. She tried to didn't let her old memories invaded her mind but she failed.

 _It was late, so late that only the cleaners were still at work in the building._

 _He was standing beside her and she could feel his arm brush almost imperceptibly against hers. None of them had spoken about what had happened the previous night. They didn't have had the opportunity or at least, they had avoided the opportunity to arise, she couldn't tell._

 _It was a mistake, an accident probably due to fatigue and to the excitement of the moment. Her eyes were fixed on the elevator's floor, which worked too slowly for her taste. She could felt the beating of her heart becoming faster in her chest. Tension and discomfort seemed to saturate the atmosphere. Ordinarily, she would have immediately get everything clear. She would have taken action and made sure that this kind of thing could never happen again. However, at this time, everything was different. Everything was different because it was him. Because no matter the words which would come out of her mouth and the belief that she would put in her tone, he would be able, with only one look, to know that nothing was true, that she was speaking with her head and not her heart. He seemed to be able to read her like an open book. Not because of his job, but because of an inexplicable reason, he knew her by heart._

 _Suddenly, she felt his fingers gently stroke hers and she had to fight with all her strength to not shudder. She kept her eyes on the floor, but unconsciously, she let her thumb brush lightly the back of his hand. She was playing with fire._ They _were playing with fire!_

 _"Abigail…," he whispered, turning abruptly toward her, his hand firmly gripping her elbow to keep her close to him._

 _For the first time since they had entered in this elevator, her gaze met his and Abby suddenly felt like she was running out of air._

"That's your floor right? " he pointed out to her the man who stood before her.

The question abruptly brought her back to reality. Abby nodded vigorously and muttered a few words of apology as she was sneaking between other users. Once outside, the woman ran a hand over her face and tried to take her composure back.

"Let's go !" she muttered to herself before pushing the door of the Behavioral Analysis Unit.

* * *

"If you had plans for this weekend, it's time to cancel it. And I'm not saying that just for you Octavia, " exclaimed the agent Raven Reyes as she was entering the meeting room, her arms filled with records.

All eyes turned toward the youngest member of the team. The young woman shrugged ostensibly and shook her head like if she had no idea about what the analyst was talking about.

"Do not act innocent ! Do you really think I haven't seen this beautiful Greek god who dropped you off this morning? " teased the agent Gina Martin by exchanging a knowing glance with Raven.

"Who is she speaking about? " inquired suddenly Bellamy with a suspicious glance in the direction of his little sister.

"Raven ! The case ! Now ! " exclaimed Marcus who had no time to waste with this childishness.

If in recent years, the agent Kane was accustomed to working with young adults, he wasn't nonetheless become more conciliatory with them. Although he wasn't the oldest of the team, the agent David Miller preceding him of a few years, he was the one who always broke the mood, the one who call them to order, the one who was almost unable to smile. However, he was also the one who knew how to motivate them when they needed it, the one who encouraged them to use all of their capacity and the one who knew to congratulate them when they deserved it.

" Immediately Sir ! " Raven said as she hurried to distribute to each member of the team a copy of the file.

Once done, the woman grabbed a remote and activated the overhead projector. The photograph of a body, face against the ground and covered by blood, appeared on the whiteboard.

"Dante Wallace, seventy-three years old. He was found dead in his country house, two days ago. He has obviously been tortured. We don't have the results of the autopsy yet, but the hundreds of superficial lesions on the body left no doubt. A priori, he would have been killed by a bullet through the heart, " she explained seriously while the team was listening to her quietly.

"A robbery gone wrong? The killer might have simply wanted to make him say his credit card number," Octavia offered as she was leaning against the back of her seat, as if the case has, finally no interest to her.

"Nothing has been stolen and— " Raven began to answer but she suddenly stopped and turned her head slightly toward the agent Kane.

Marcus nodded and the young agent moved on the next photograph of the crime scene. This time, the body was on its back and the image was centered on his forehead.

" Does that remind you of something? " asked Raven.

The oldest members of the team nodded while Gina and Octavia shook their head negatively.

"For those who weren't there six years ago, this is the infinite symbol, but I bet you already know. Where it gets interesting is that during the last fifteen years, it had been found on over fifty crime scene across the country. On the victim himself or on an object or a nearby wall. These crimes have probably all been committed by members of a sect: The City of Light. A group of nut who believe that the greatest danger to the mankind is the mankind itself, well except for them of course, they consider themselves as the elect beings, " she explained with a slight smirk.

"What happened six years ago? " inquired Octavia, visibly more interested than a few minutes earlier.

Raven brought out the portrait of an Afro-American man, around forty-year-old and opened her mouth to answer, but she was cut off by the intervention of another person who was standing in the doorway of the room.

"Their leader was arrested! Thelonius Jaha. He was a member of the Congress. He was elected in New York. He is currently serving a life sentence at the Red Onion State Prison in Virginia. He was the one who decided who could leave or who had to die, that's why no other murder has been recorded since his arrest. At least until today," replied a female voice.

Marcus felt all of his muscles tensed. He didn't need to turn around to know to whom this voice belonged to. He swallowed hard but tried to keep a perfectly neutral expression.

Raven's face seemed to light up while those who had known the Dr. Griffin in the past seemed as stunned as their boss to see her here.

"Maybe a former member wanted to finish the job? " Octavia offered as she didn't seem bothered by the intervention of a woman she didn't know.

" It's unlikely. The members of the COL are extremely submissive, either because they firmly believe Jaha's precepts or because they are certain to be paid for their work, " Abby stated as she walked in the room.

All eyes were now fixed on her, except Kane's. He stayed motionless with his back to her, but Abby couldn't help but notice the way his fingers were particularly tightened around the armrest of his seat.

"An imitator then? " asked Gina.

"This is what we have to determine, " Marcus replied abruptly in place of the criminologist.

"First, we must focus on the victim, establish his profile and eliminate all other motives : family tensions, economic or sentimental, problems with his company, burglary … Well, you know your job. If we got nothing then we'll search for something linked with the COL, " he said with his usual professional tone before getting up from his seat.

"Raven give them a quick rundown about Dante Wallace! I'll let you finish, I have a phone call to make, " he added, pulling out his phone from his pocket.

Then Marcus turned toward the exit and this time he couldn't avoid to be facing to the last woman on earth he wanted to recross one day.

"Dr. Griffin," he greeted her coldly, looking at her right in the eyes for a split second before getting around to leave the conference room.

"Agent Kane, " she replied with the same tone, emotionless.

It could have been worse, she tried to convince herself, although the way her heart had suddenly tighten in her chest when his eyes had crossed hers told her the opposite.

After the agent Kane had left the room, the atmosphere seemed to relax. Raven put the remote on the table and walked toward the criminologist to take her in her arms.

"Abby ! I missed you, " she said warmly.

Despite their age and personality differences , the two women were especially close when the Dr. Griffin has first come in Quantico. Abby had liked all the team members, but Raven had become something like a friend to her.

"Dr. Griffin! Welcome back! " Bellamy exclaimed, shaking her hand.

"This is my sister, agent Octavia Blake and our new former liaison Gina Martin, " he added, as the two women addressed her a nod.

For a split second, Abby hesitated to express her condolences to the Blake, but she changed her mind at the last moment. This was neither the time nor the place and somehow, she wasn't supposed to be aware of their mother's death. Furthermore, her arrival and Marcus reaction had already cast a chill more than enough for today.

"I don't need to introduce you to the agent Miller, " Bellamy continued as he turned his head toward the senior of the team.

"Dr. Griffin, " Miller greeted her with a pleasant smile.

"I thought the agent Iceta had told you I was coming…," said Abby, still uncomfortable due to Kane's reaction.

"No, but that's not a problem, you're just in time! " Raven reassured her.

"Please sit down! " she added by seizing the remote control to display again the photography of Dante Wallace's corpse.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

Marcus walked into his office and closed the door behind him. Without losing time, he called his supervisor, determined to get explanations.

"Agent Nia Iceta," said a cold voice after a few rings.

"Why is the Dr. Griffin here? " he asked without preamble and without taking care to hide his displeasure.

"Agent Kane, good morning to you too! "said the agent Iceta ironically.

Marcus grimaced. He has always hated to be implicitly called to order by this woman.

"I intended to advise you of her arrival, but I had an unexpected setback this morning. Anyway, I'm glad to hear she has joined the team. So, I assume you have already set to work," she said with a neutral tone.

"While I don't doubt of Dr. Griffin's expertise, my team doesn't need help. We can perfectly handle this," Marcus objected, struggling to not be too unpleasant.

"Come on agent Kane, I know exactly what you and your agents can do, that's not the point. Dr. Griffin knows this case like the back of her hand. You have already worked together six years ago and that led to the arrest of the head of the COL. Her presence at your side can only be beneficial, " the agent Iceta argued.

"We both know that she is personally concerned by this case. She can't work on it, it's against the rules of the F.B.I," Marcus firmly objected.

"I understand your concerns, but six years ago she has perfectly been able to handle this case. It doesn't seem to be a problem for her," said the section chief, totally composed.

"At least, you could have asked my opinion," huffed the agent Kane.

"I didn't think it would be a problem. You seemed to get along with her when she first came. The team members were also very pleased with her work," she reminded him, probably with a smirk on her lips.

"That's not the point! " he grumbled before letting out a sigh.

"Sorry agent Kane but again, I think this is the point ! But no matter what may or not may have happened between you and Dr. Griffin it doesn't concern me and it can't interfere with your investigation. Furthermore, I'm still your superior so if you want to contest my decisions do it ! Write a report ! Send it to my boss ! But for now, Dr. Griffin remains a consultant on this case! " she said, this time, very firmly.

"I don't intend to, ma'am, "he replied reluctantly.

" Good to know ! In that case, hang up the phone and go solve this murder! You know as well as I do that everything related to the COL ruffle feathers to the highest levels of the State! " she intimated him coldly.

"Yes ma'am. Goodbye ma'am !" he said dryly before hanging up.

Marcus dropped heavily on his chair and clenched his teeth to prevent himself to swear out loud. At that moment, he couldn't say towards who his anger was actually directed the most.

On one hand, he was mad at Abigail Griffin, but the unexpected arrival of the criminologist was far from being the only reason for his animosity toward her.

On the other hand, he was angry at the agent Iceta for not having asked him his opinion and because she didn't even bother to inform him. Despite the years, their relationship had never been particularly good. Nia Iceta was a difficult section chief, more concerned about her career than about the arrest of dangerous criminals. Admittedly she was competent, she wouldn't be at this position if she wasn't, but there was something about her that had always made the agent Kane suspicious. She could sometimes be manipulative or even deceitful. By the way, Marcus had one day heard Octavia say that she was sometimes worst than some serial killer in term of psychopathy level.

However, Kane was also mad at himself. He should have known. How could he have though that his superior wasn't going to call Abigail Griffin? Even if he would never have believed that the criminologist would say yes, given the way things turned out the first time she came, he should have, at least, known that Iceta would want her in the team.

It had already been the same six years ago …

 _Like every morning since he joined the Behavioural Analysis Unit Marcus, Kane stopped at the Starbucks Coffee located a few meters from the FBI National Academy. Unsurprisingly, the shop was already full of students whom were enjoying their last moments of peace before the start of classes. If the rigorous training seemed to have chastened the older, it was obviously not yet the same for the youngest. A small group seemed particularly agitated and some of them seemed unwilling to wait patiently for their turn._

 _Far too preoccupied as he was, about the case on which he and his team were working on from several weeks by now, Marcus didn't really pay attention to them . He just gave them a dirty look when one of them tried to squeeze between him and the person who preceded him. The student caught his eyes and froze for a second. Realizing he was caught, the young man hurried to turn around, his gaze fixed on his feet. In the rush, he didn't see the woman who, newly served, was walking toward the exit and jostled her violently. The coffee and the records she was holding slipped out of her hands and fell to the floor. Marcus saw her losing her balance and without thinking twice he took a step forward and caught her in extremis._

 _"Out of my sight !" he hissed between his teeth towards the students who hurried to leave the store._

 _"Are you ok? " he asked the woman he was holding in his arms, one hand around her elbow and one around her waist._

 _"I've been through worse," she answered, pulling quickly away from him._

 _Marcus let his gaze slide a moment on her as she seemed to measure the extent of the damage at her feet. He had never seen her here before. He was sure of it ! How could he not remember a woman like her? She seemed to be around thirty-five years. She had long brown hair which fell gracefully over her shoulders. Her eyes were chocolate, embellished with a discreet and perfect makeup. Her clothing was very professional: a black pencil dress which lightly brushed her upper knee with no cleavage. Despite the beige trench coat she was wearing open, Marcus noticed she was very tiny and without her black heels, she should be a head shorter than him. Yet, something seemed to issue from this woman, a kind of unexplained strength, poise and assurance._

 _"Let me help you," he said as she squatted to gather her sheet._

 _"Thanks, but it's not necessary," she replied with annoyance as she yanked a piece of paper out of his hands._

 _Marcus raised an eyebrow at her, surprised by such reaction. She probably noticed his confusion because she stopped to collect her stuff and ran a weary hand through her hair._

 _"I'm sorry," she finally apologized._

 _"I shouldn't have, well you know," she said, slightly shaking her hands, referring to her previous behavior._

 _"I have a very important appointment in a few minutes and I think I'm a little stressed," she explained with a shy smile._

 _" I understand, " Marcus merely replied with a warm look._

 _"It seems, the man I'm supposed to meet isn't very willing to receive me and from what I heard, he's well…he's not really friendly," she added, putting her sheet in her purse._

 _"I'm sure that your appointment will be fine," he said sincerely without thinking._

 _The woman lifted her head towards him and gave him a half-inquisitive half-amused look._

 _"I mean, it's what I wish for you," he hastened to correct himself._

 _Indeed, the fact that he was fell under this woman's spell in a split second, doesn't mean that would be the same for everyone. After all, he didn't know her and he had no idea what kind of appointment this was. He couldn't objectively be so categorical._

 _"Thank you," she whispered with a smile before getting back on her feet._

 _"Go ahead. I will tell the employees that there is something here to clean, no need to take the risk of being late to your appointment," he told her as she seemed to be looking around for an employee._

 _The woman stared at him a few more seconds and then nodded slightly._

 _"Thank you very much," she thanked him again._

 _Marcus nodded and looked at her until she disappeared behind the door._

 _About ten minutes later, Kane walked into the meeting room. A part of his team was already there, waiting. When they saw him, all of them immediately stopped talking and some of them let out a slight laugh._

 _"What?" he asked suspiciously, frowning._

 _"Nothing," replied innocently Raven with an amused smile on her lips before looking at her files again._

 _"So boss ? How was the coffee this morning?" asked Bellamy as he walked in, which immediately prompted some other snigger._

 _"So good that he didn't even saw me," commented nonchalantly Raven without bothering to look up._

 _Marcus opened his mouth to call them to order, but words failed him sorely. In fact, it was true. He didn't have noticed Raven in the coffee shop, but after all, how could it have been otherwise_ _when his attention was monopolized by such woman like that stranger._

 _"I see you are all there, this is perfect! " exclaimed suddenly the agent Iceta's voice behind him._

 _"Let me introduce you to Dr. Abigail Griffin, she will be a consultant on this case, " she added as a woman walked in behind her._

 _Marcus turned and for a split second, he seemed to forget how to breathe._

 _"I told you that the coffee was very good…" murmured quietly Raven to her colleagues who tried not to laugh._

A few knocks on the office door made him come back to reality. He shook his head to ward off the last remains of a long gone past from his mind and cleared his throat.

" Yes !" he replied dryly.

Abby took a deep breath and opened the door. What it was going to be said in this office will not be very pleasant, but it was too late to run away again. Obviously, Marcus was still mad at her and honestly, she couldn't blame him. She deserved his anger and his resentment.

As he saw her, Marcus stood up from his seat and crossed his arms on his chest without a word. He just stared at her quietly as she carefully closed the door behind her and leaned against it.

Six years had passed since their last meeting but Abigail Griffin didn't have changed. It was like if time had barely touched her when he felt like if twenty years had fallen on his own shoulders. Although he tried to keep his eyes fixed on her face, Marcus couldn't help but notice the way the cleavage of her suit jacket subtly let glimpse the base of her breasts while the fabric of her skirt fitted her thighs like a second skin. Despite everything that happened between them, if there was one thing that anger and resentment couldn't erase was the desire he felt for this woman.

Abby let her gaze run on the floor a few minutes. She couldn't find the right words. No matter how they linked together in her mind, none of them seemed to be good. Anyway, after six years, nothing she could say now would be satisfactory.

"I thought Iceta had informed you, I thought … I hoped you agreed," she said with shifty eyes.

"You hoped !" he repeated ironically.

Abby found the courage to cast a furtive glance over him, but the way he stared at her forced her to look away again. She had though about this conversation a million times over the past six years. She had considered every possible scenario, the worst and the best. In truth, especially the worst. But, in the end, she wasn't ready at all.

"How could you think, even for one second, that I would have agreed? How could have you say yes? " he asked with exasperation.

Abby felt her body tense.

"You know why I did it! " she answered, this time, more sharply than she wanted by glaring at him.

A wry smile stretched Marcus' lips, now hidden by a salt and pepper beard.

"It has nothing to do with us Marcus! If the COL is active again we must put our personal differences aside and find a way to stop them before another person gets killed, "she added more calmly as she took a step towards him.

Marcus shook his head.

"We don't need your help! Moreover, I became an expert about sectarian crimes," he said coldly before opening a drawer and pulled out a book.

"Thanks to you! Very good picture, by the way, you are radiant," he added bitterly, throwing the book on the desk.

Abby didn't need to take a look at the cover to guess the title of the book: _City of Light: From the personal destruction to the collective annihilation._

"Very good book! I have particularly appreciated the part where you describe me as an agent who, I quote : has a strength that is not weakened by sentiment. Coming from you, that's –"he said, finishing his sentence by a humorless laugh.

"I was talking about the agent Kane, not about the Marcus Kane I know! "she hastened to object before turning over the book to hide her own photo.

Abby had always hated that picture even if she got many compliments because of it. This smile offered to the readers was a showcase, a commercial argument chosen by her publisher without her consent. Contrary to what Marcus could think, this smile didn't reflect the state of mind in which she had been in the past six years.

"You think you know! " he corrected her sharply.

"Because definitely no Abby, you don't know me! The proof is that you thought I had agreed to let you come back here, " he added dryly.

"I said I hoped that you agreed. I know you haven't forgiven me, but –" she said with a softer tone but Kane didn't give her the time to finish her sentence.

"What you did is unforgivable Abby, " he cut her off with a cold voice.

Abby winced and stare at her feet again. She nodded almost imperceptibly, unable to contradict him.

"When this is all over, we'll have to talk Marcus," she said, looking at him again.

"There is nothing more to say, " he replied emotionless.

This time, Abby continued to stare at him intently. There was a time when one eye-contact was enough for them to understand each other. Both of them was able to read each other mind.

At that moment, she wanted to tell him so many things, providing him explanations, make him understand that he was wrong about her, but after six years, he seemed not willing to hear what she wanted to tell him.

Marcus held her gaze but struggled with all his strength to not interpret what he might find there. He had already made this mistake six years ago and all his convictions were ultimately proved to be incorrect. He was wrong or she had misled him, he couldn't say, but in any case, he will never be fooled by this woman again.

Suddenly the door office opened.

" Oh ! I should have knocked, " exclaimed Octavia as they both hastened to break eye contact.

" Like always, " commented Marcus coldly, trying to hide his discomfort.

"Yeah… I'll try to think about it next time," Octavia replied absently as she was staring suspiciously at Abby.

" What do you want? " inquired Kane as he put away the book in the drawer of his desk.

"Just let you know that Bellamy and I were about to go interrogate Dante Wallace's son," she answered, her eyes still fixed on the criminologist.

"Dr. Griffin, a little trip with the Blakes? " she proposed with a malicious smile on her lips.

Abby hesitated. She glanced at Marcus for a second but he seemed to carefully avoid her gaze.

"I … Yes, why not … Let's go !" she finally answered with a forced smile.

" Cool ! " Octavia commented before leaving the office.

Abby took one last look at Kane then hastened to follow the young woman.

Marcus sank back down on his chair and buried his head in his hands. He hated this woman for all she had done to him, but even worse, he hated himself to still feel something for her after all she had done to him!


	3. Chapter 3

**I didn't found a Beta for this chapter so sorry for the mistakes. If someone is interested by checking my next chapter, feel free to let me know ! Sorry for the wait too !**

 **Chapter 3 :**

Sitting on the passenger seat, Abby was watching the Blakes fighting about the wheel. Bellamy had the keys in his hand, but his sister clearly didn't intend to give up so easily. Although shorter than him, the young woman still managed, with a good footwork, to grab his wrist. Without wasting a second, she turned on herself and locked his arm behind his back.

"I think we can go now," she cried out triumphantly when his brother finally admitted his defeat.

The criminologist let out a chuckle and rolled her eyes as Maya Vie's words were coming back to her mind. " _You won't be disappointed"_. It was, indeed, an understatement. The agent Octavia Blake was obviously hot-blooded.

With a sullen face, Bellamy sat in the backseat while his sister switched on the GPS. The travel was around one hour. However, after just a several seconds, Abby realized that Octavia didn't intend to take that long.

Cage Wallace currently resided at the Hamilton Crowne Plaza in Washington DC. According to his secretary, he didn't plan to stay more than a few days. In fact, just the time needed to organize his father's funeral and finalize the last details of the estate.

"To make sure she didn't miss anything, but also to prevent herself from swooning because of Octavia's driving, Abby decided to read one more time Dante Wallace's folder. He was 73 years old. He was the founder of the Mount Weather Company, a real empire with many areas of activity but mostly specialized on manufacturing drugs and vaccines. Relatively discreet, the businessman was nonetheless very influential in Washington. According to the first elements of the investigation, he was a great pharmaceutical lobbyist. Given his business and fortune, Mr. Wallace had with no doubt an impressive list of enemies.

Flipping through the pages of the case file, carefully prepared by the agent Reyes, Abby stopped on some old newspaper clippings. In 2005, the MWC had been ordered to pay $ 106 million damages because of the death of several people who had ingested their drug. Some associations had tried to prove that the company had falsified the results of clinical testing, but the little evidence they had managed to collect had been declared inadmissible by the court.

Abby folded the edge of the page to mark it. It was a non-negligible lead. Many relatives of victims or activists could certainly have murdered Dante Wallace for revenge.

Then, the woman stopped on the personal file of the victim. The old man had lost his wife 35 years ago. Alyssa Wallace had died after a long battle with bone cancer. He never get married again and it seemed that there was no trace of any other relationship. He had raised his son alone, or rather paid many nurses to do it for him. Cage Wallace was his sole heir, so now, he headed an empire evaluated around ten $ billion.

Dante Wallace had his main residence in a beautiful building in the center of Washington, but he owned twenty houses and apartments throughout the country. His body had been discovered in one of his country houses at the east of the city and according to Raven, it was where he spent most of his weekends when he had business to do in the capital. It was the maid who had discovered his dead body on Monday morning. According to her first deposition, Mr. Wallace father had asked all his employees to take the weekend off, which was totally unusual.

When the maid had arrived that morning, she had noticed that the alarm had been turned off and that the window which overlooked a small balcony on the second floor was unusually open. First, she had called her boss from the lobby and she had finally found his body in the middle of his office.

"Did the fingerprints have been lifting on the alarm box? " Abby asked the Blakes.

"Yes, but the technical and scientific police services haven't found anything, not even the victim's fingerprints. Which makes me say that Wallace hasn't activated the alarm during the whole weekend, which is highly unlikely, or that –" Bellamy began to answer.

"The killer knew the code, " Abby finished for him.

"Yeah," the young man agreed.

"Who had access? " she asked.

"Raven is drawing up a list of Wallace's employees and those of the security company. Apparently, a few people knew the code, especially because it was changed regularly, "said Octavia as she narrowly avoided a pedestrian who started to cross the road.

Abby held her breath for a few seconds and she had to bite her tongue very hard to doesn't make any comment about Octavia's driving.

"How often? " Abby asked, avoiding, this time, to watch the road.

"According to the maid: before each new stay of Wallace, " said the pretty brunette.

"Did it could have been hacked? "Abby inquired, arching an eyebrow.

"Raven works on that too," said Bellamy.

" Good," she nodded, before looking back at the record.

Four yellow lights and six brutal swerve later, Abby felt Octavia's gaze land on her. It was the same look that she had sent to her some time earlier in Kane's office: Suspicious, inquisitor, almost intrusive. Slightly uncomfortable, the criminologist tried to ignore the young agent, but it wasn't counting on the stubbornness of the girl.

"Kane didn't seem very glad to see you," she pointed out with a natural tone.

"Octavia! " Bellamy huffed, giving a slight kick on the seat of his sister.

Abby felt her stomach clench and she couldn't help but grimace slightly.

"What ? That's true," she defended herself.

The criminologist closed her eyes for a moment and inhaled deeply. It was more than true and only a blind person couldn't have noticed it. Caught off guard, Abby tried to find a way to answer without saying too much. Nobody knew what had really happened between her and Kane six years ago. Except her sister, Cece, but with her, it was different, she had had to give her some explanations about… Abby shook her head. It wasn't the time to think about that.

"The agent Kane is very proud. I can understand that he doesn't appreciate that his boss called in a consultant. He probably took it as a personal attack, as if indirectly, it meant that he wouldn't be able to close this case alone, "she answered, staring at Octavia, hoping to be persuasive.

"That must be it, yes," said the young woman, nodding, but Abby caught the look the Blakes exchanged in the rear-view mirror.

"He'll get over it. It's just like the first time you came. He needs a little time to get used to the idea, ", commented Bellamy with a pleasant smile.

"Yes," Abby breathed, even if she knew that, this time, things won't get any better.

This thought made her heart tighten in her chest and this time, she hastened to turn toward the window to hide her confusion. She watched the landscape scrolling as old memories were invading her thoughts.

* * *

 _Abby listened to the latest recommendations and explanations of the agent Iceta as they both walked toward the offices of the behavioral analysis unit. Rather, she tried to listen. Ordinarily, Dr. Griffin was a very attentive and focused woman, however, in that moment, her mind constantly dragged her to a few minutes earlier, to the Starbucks coffee, to the moment where she had first met the gaze of this stranger._

 _Since her husband was dead, around three years ago, Abigail Griffin had never landed her eyes on another man, at least not that way. It had never really been a conscious choice dictated by some moral consideration or because she thought she had to respect an acceptable period of mourning. It was simply because a part of herself had died with Jake that cursed night and that the other part had no room for anything else than her daughter and her work. At least that's what she thought until today._

 _She couldn't say what this stranger had so special compared to other men. It was maybe the way his both arms had wrapped innocently and securely around her waist when she was about to fall. Or his look both dark and deep that, for a split of second, she had felt like she was drowning. Or his bright smile and his assured and comforting voice which had made her feel invincible._

 _"Like I said, the agent Kane was fairly against the idea of working with a consultant, but given your knowledge of the case, I haven't seen fit to consider of his reluctance. He probably won't make you a good first impression but once he became aware of your skills I don't doubt that he will be more accommodating," said the agent Iceta._

 _"I don't know if I'm reassured," Abby said, chuckling nervously._

 _"I think it's only fair to warn you. I wouldn't want him to make you run away as soon as your first day. We really need you, Doctor Griffin," added the woman, laying a hand on her forearm as if she wanted to be sure that the criminologist was well aware of her importance on this case._

 _Abby nodded seriously._

 _"I intend to do everything in my power to stop the activities of this sect, you can count on me," Abby assured her with determination._

 _"Good!", nodded the agent Iceta._

 _"Ready?" inquired the latter when they arrived at the entrance to a meeting room._

 _"Yes," Abby confirmed, her hands tightening nonetheless around the file she was holding._

 _"You're all here, this is perfect», exclaimed Iceta as she was entering the room._

 _"Let me introduce you to Doctor Abigail Griffin. She will be a consultant on your case," she added, shifting to let the criminologist walk into the room._

 _Abby offered a pleasant smile to the meeting, but when the man who stood back to her, turned around, she froze. Her own words came back to her mind and she felt her cheeks catching fire. "_ It seems, the man I'm supposed to meet isn't very willing to receive me and from what I heard, he's well…he's not really friendly, _"._

 _The criminologist didn't need to wait for the introductions to realize that the stranger of the Starbucks was none other than Marcus Kane. If he wouldn't have her on this case before even having met her so, this time, there were no doubt that he would do everything to make her go as fast as he could!_

 _"Doctor Griffin, this is the agent Kane and his team," introduced the agent Iceta._

 _"Doctor Griffin," the agent Kane greeted her, reaching out his hand, in a way which couldn't be more professional._

 _Abby fought with all her strength to keep a perfect neutral expression, however, when her hand slipped into Kane's she couldn't help but shudder._

 _" Nice to meet you," she said, trying to offer him a professional smile._

 _The man's face seemed to be cast in stone, but the way he gazed at her gave her a strange feeling that perhaps, all was not lost._

 _Around two briefing hours later, the agent Kane finally allowed his team to take a break. Everyone left the room except Abby who stayed to read once again the record of the last victim._

 _Diana Sydney was a Deputy White House Counsel and was supposed to be appointed to the Supreme Court of the United States. She was known as a progressive and the agent Reyes had discovered that during her youth she had been rather close to some communist factions. Single and childless, her body had been found two weeks earlier in the parking garage of her building. Her throat had been cut from ear to ear and the sign of the COL had been carefully drawn with her blood on the windshield of her Mercedes._

 _"You should take five minutes for yourself, our work is far from over," the agent Kane said as he entered the room._

 _Abby looked up at him and closed the file, squirming nervously on her chair._

 _"Thanks, but I'm okay," she politely declined._

 _" Do you want some? " Marcus offered her as he was pouring himself a cup of coffee._

 _"Yes, thank you, " she answered before getting up and walking towards him._

 _"It's not as good as those of the Starbucks," he said with a soft smile as he handed her a cup._

 _At the mention of the coffee shop, Abby couldn't help but wince._

 _"I'm sorry for what I said earlier, about … Well, you know," she apologized with shifty eyes._

 _"What did you said?" he pretended to ask with a slight smirk._

 _"Oh I got it ! You said that you were about to meet a not really friendly person. Yes, I remember now," he teased her before letting out a chuckle._

 _"I shouldn't have said that … It was inappropriate and it was–," she said as she was mentally blaming herself, but the agent Kane cut her off._

 _" –the absolute truth," he finished her sentence with a fake expression of guilt._

 _"According to the team," he added, shrugging._

 _Abby stared at him quietly for a few seconds. A slight smile, half-ashamed, half-amused, finally stretched up her lips. Marcus Kane wasn't like she had imagined him by hearing the agent Iceta talking about the cold and austere chief of the BAU._

 _Behind this dark suit and this stereotypical attitude of an F.B.I agent, the criminologist had the strange feeling to discern something quite different in him : a kind of gentleness and kindness, invisible at first glance._

 _"But don't worry about this Doctor Griffin," he tried to reassure her before drinking a sip of coffee._

 _"Besides, I also owe you an apology," he spoke again, this time, more seriously._

 _Abby arched an eyebrow, surprised._

 _"Obviously, the agent Iceta told you about my reluctances and I don't want you to feel uncomfortable. We are not used to working with consultants and I have to admit that I am wary of university lecturers. They are competent, that' not the problem. It's just that they didn't have the field experience and sometimes it can be troublesome," he explained with a more professional tone._

 _Abby remained quiet for a moment, wondering if she should take his words as a personal attack. She never liked being judged on her work even before she had the opportunity to show what she was capable of._

 _"Fresh air and sunlight are not made for bookworms hum?" she retorted him wryly before taking a sip of coffee._

 _"You're twisting my words," said the agent Kane as another smile stretched up his lips._

 _Abby glanced at him a moment._

 _"Don't worry agent Kane, I could make myself as quiet as a mouse," she bit back before turning around and going back to sit._

* * *

" Here we are," Octavia exclaimed while the Hamilton Crowne Plaza loomed in the distance.


	4. Chapter 4

**Thank you to tinkbooklover for her help 3 !**

The door of the suite number 325 opened and a dark-haired woman with a tanned complexion appeared. She seemed to be about forty years old and she was wearing a pencil skirt and a black blazer, certainly very expensive. Without saying a word, the woman stared pointedly at the two agent Blake's then turned her face toward Abby, who had deliberately remained slightly back.

"I am Doctor Lorelei Tsing. I work at the Mount Weather Company. You must be the agents of the F.B.I, " she said, holding her hand toward the criminologist.

Abby hesitated for a moment, both surprised and uncomfortable. If her presence alongside the two agents was official, she wasn't entitled to question witnesses. In truth, she was there as an observer, nothing more.

"Doctor Abigail Griffin. I'm a consultant on this case, but indeed, the agents Bellamy Blake and Octavia Blake are members of the behavioral analysis unit," she explained, shaking hands with the woman, not without casting a furtive look at her two partners.

"I guess, it was you on the phone, " declared Doctor Tsing, this time by looking at Bellamy.

" Yes, "he confirmed by holding his hand to greet her.

"I didn't expect agents so…, so young," she said disdainfully, without bothering to answer the handshake offered by Bellamy.

"Do you have a problem with that?" Octavia asked suddenly, in a tone which didn't call for a wrong answer.

"No. Of course not. I'm just…, I'm just surprised that's all. ", replied Lorelei Tsing with a hypocritical smile.

"We're here to talk to Mr. Cage Wallace," Bellamy hastened to say, to dispel the unease which was clearly beginning to settle.

"Yes, he is waiting for you. If you'll come this way, " declared the woman before shifting to let them in.

Without bothering to wait for Octavia to close the door behind them, Doctor Tsing crossed the huge living room and headed for a sliding door at the back of the room.

"We're in the wrong business, bro, " whispered Octavia by giving a slight nudge to her brother, as she was looking around the room.

"Wait a minute, please," the Doctor Tsing asked coldly before disappearing into the adjacent room.

"I hope she killed him! Nothing would make me happier than handcuffing this bitch, "Octavia grumbled quietly.

Bellamy and Abby exchanged an amused look, but none of them bothered to reply.

"Mr. Wallace, F.B.I agents are there, " Doctor Tsing's voice echoed behind the half-opened door.

" Good. Show them right in, " replied a male voice.

Doctor Tsing opened the door wider and invited them to enter with a wave of her hand.

"My condolences Mr. Wallace. I'm agent Bellamy Blake, this is agent Octavia Blake and Doctor Griffin," Bellamy declared by walking towards the victim's son to shake his hand.

Octavia and Abby offered him a slight nod. Their host was sitting on a wide leather chair, his elbows on his knees. Despite his suit and his impeccable hairstyle, the criminologist couldn't help but notice that his face looked like if he hadn't slept for several days.

"Please have a seat," he offered them, pointing at the couch in front of him.

Bellamy and Abby sat down, but Octavia remained standing.

"You have to find out who did it," exclaimed the business man after a few seconds of silence before burying his head in his hands.

"That's why we're here sir," Bellamy assured him seriously.

"We have to ask you some questions," the young agent added, pulling out a small notebook from his inside pocket.

Cage Wallace nodded.

"Where were you the weekend of your father's death? " Bellamy started to question him.

"I was in Boston. I was invited to the inauguration of a friend's nightclub. I arrived at the airport on Friday afternoon around four p.m and I came back immediately after the call from the police on Monday. This is his contact details, he can confirm that. "he said, putting a business card on the table.

"How was your relationship with your father? " Bellamy spoke again with a perfectly neutral tone by putting the card in his pocket.

"Well, we didn't agree with everything, but it was often irrelevant. "Cage Wallace asserted, shrugging.

"One of the employees of the MWC told the police that he heard an argument between you and your father about three months ago. According to him, Mr. Wallace had threatened to not let you head the company after his departure," Octavia declared abruptly.

The man looked up at her, clearly surprised. For a split second, Abby saw a shade of anger passed across his face, but he quickly recovered.

" This is true ! We argued, " he conceded, looking at Bellamy again.

"He may have said something like that but it was only empty words," he explained with a straight face.

Bellamy slightly nodded and scribbled a few words in his notebook.

"My father is–" he began to add before stopping and wincing.

"Was," he corrected himself by closing his eyes for a moment as if using the past form to talk about his father was painful to him.

"A demanding man. He thought I wasn't invested enough to the MWC. I haven't always been the perfect son, far from it, but I worked very hard and things have settled. " he went on, this time looking at Abby.

"Did your father have any enemies? " the criminologist asked.

"More than you can imagine," he answered before letting out a slight joyless laugh as if the question was almost absurd.

"He received threats? " inquired Bellamy.

"Not directly, but if you type his name on the internet, you'll find a lot of articles inciting more or less explicitly to lash out at the MWC or at my father, " he explained with a hint of anger which made his voice shake.

"Do you think this is related to the scandal of the Lexotop?" asked the criminologist.

"Among other things. The pharmaceutical industry may not be very reputable, you know. Most people think that we are responsible for all the ills of the world. Our medicines save lives every day, but it's rarely what they retain. " he declared bitterly.

"And in his personal life? Any problems that you're aware of?" Octavia questioned.

" Not to my knowledge. My father never had many friends and in terms of his love life, I know absolutely nothing," he replied, shaking his head.

"Have you ever heard about a sect called the City of Light, Mr. Wallace? " Abby asked carefully, scrutinizing his reaction.

Cage Wallace seemed to think a few seconds.

"Just what the news said when their leader had been arrested a few years ago," he finally said .

"Thelonius Jaha," Abby said, still staring at him.

Wallace nodded.

"Do you know him? " Bellamy asked.

" No. I might have passed him at some reception in Washington, but I don't remember him, " he said with a shrug.

" Why all these questions? " he asked, frowning.

"Their symbol was drawn with blood on the forehead of your father, " Octavia explained without any precautions.

" On his…Oh my god, " Wallace exclaimed, visibly shocked before burying his head in his hands.

Bellamy took the opportunity to give a slightly reproving look at his sister, who merely shrugged.

"Was your father or the MWC working on a particular project? A new drug, a new treatment? "the young agent asked in a softer tone to offset the lack of tact of his sister.

"That information is confidential" Doctor Tsing who had previously remained near the door, said abruptly.

"We don't have to write it in the file, we only need to know if the COL could have a reason to kill Mr. Wallace," Bellamy explained while the woman was walking into the room and stopped next to Cage Wallace.

The latter looked up at her with a questioning gaze. Doctor Tsing just shook her head.

"I'm sorry," she declared firmly with one hand on Cage's shoulder.

"Mr. Wallace, we really need that information," Bellamy pleaded, seeking to get his attention.

"Then find a judge who will issue a warrant," retorted Doctor Tsing, raising a challenging eyebrow.

"It would be a waste of time," objected the young agent.

"It's still a no, " reaffirmed categorically the woman.

Bellamy sighed.

"And you, where were you doctor Tsing?"Abby questioned her with a falsely innocent tone.

A sardonic smile stretched on the woman's face.

"I spent the weekend at a pharmaceutical conference in the Boston Habor Hotel. Hundreds of people can confirm. I even made an intervention. It was filmed if you are interested!" Doctor Tsing replied sarcastically.

"Perfect, we'll check it out," Abby stated, weighing her up.

* * *

Bellamy asked some other questions for another ten minutes, but none of the answers given by Cage Wallace or Doctor Ching were satisfying. Obviously, they were hiding things related to the MWC, but, as Octavia rightly pointed out when they get into the car, no judge would agree to issue a warrant without a shred of evidence.

"Do you think he was sincere?" Abby inquired while Bellamy was starting the engine.

"Hard to say. He didn't expect us to know about the argument," said the young officer.

"He was annoyed even though he tried to not show it," Octavia pointed out.

"Well, nobody likes to be suspected, that doesn't mean he is guilty," retorted Bellamy, giving her a quick glance in the rearview mirror.

Octavia merely shrugged.

"We have to check out if Dante Wallace changed his will. If that's the case, his lawyer will know. He just might have talked about it without having had time to make it happen. "Abby declared, starting to leaf through the folder again.

"I'll tell Gina to take care of this once she's done with the alibis check," Octavia said, pulling out her phone from her pocket.

"If we must question Cage Wallace again, we have to see him alone. Without Doctor Tsing, he would probably have said more,"added Abby, looking at the only page of the file about the woman.

Loreilei Tsing had worked at the MWC for many years and had probably moved up the ladder in record time. She started to work as a simple researcher and became the principal collaborator of the victim section in just seven years.

"Do you think they are sleeping together?" Octavia asked, while typing on her phone.

"I can't say, but she has an influence on him, for sure," Abby stated.

* * *

When they finally arrived at the office of the BAU, shortly after noon, Abby spent the rest of the day exploring the sites and internet forums mentioned by Cage. She was looking for some posts a little too virulent against the MWC or Dante Wallace. The list of suspects was particularly long and she had to make a first selecting. With the F.B.I database, she focused her research on family members of victims and activists who had already been violent in the past. Though most of them had no criminal record, a small number had accumulated several sentences of all kinds: theft, assault, damage to property. However, nothing that could suggest that one of them might have committed a murder as violent as of Dante Wallace. The victim had been tortured. Probably for long hours, considering the number of superficial wounds which covered his body. If everyone was able to commit a murder one, few people were actually able to torture. For doing this it was necessary to handle the cries, the supplications and the moans of pain. You had to have a taste for blood and a coldness on the brink of the pathology.

When the members of the team decided it was time to go home, Abby decided to do the same. Agent Kane hadn't left his office all day and she didn't want to risk running into him.

As they were all walking toward the parking lot, Raven offered to get a drink in town but the criminologist declined her invitation. She had something else to do before going to her hotel room.

Around ten minutes later, Abby was walking in a long and dark corridor of the F.B.I academy. She had already been here once, last September and her memories were still fresh enough for her to find the door she was looking for.

"Aren't you sick of it guys? Jasper put that damn book away, it's getting late, "exclaimed a voice which Abby would have recognized among thousands.

"And she is even hotter in person, buddy," said a male voice.

"Do you think she will still be there tomorrow?" inquired another boy, with excitement.

Abby raised her arm to knock against the half-opened door, but she changed her mind when she recognized the young man she had met earlier in the day. She could see him through the partially open door. He was sitting on a bed, next to another young man she didn't know.

"Seriously guys, she could be your mother," said a girl with an exasperated voice.

"Mother I'd like to fuck," whispered one of the boys.

"Enough! Now, give me that book Jasper," exclaimed Clarke as she tried to slip the book out from the boy's hand.

Abby couldn't help but wince as she realized that the boys were probably speaking about her.

"Hey no! Clarke! Give it to me," the boy cried in a vain.

"What's your problem?" asked the other man with a suspicious frown.

Abby heard her daughter sighed and she wondered if she should leave and come back later.

"The problem is that it's my mother you're talking about!" the young woman finally answered, throwing the book to the other side of the room.

" Noooo ! You can't be serious," exclaimed Jasper before starting to laugh.

"You mean that… You mean that Abigail Griffin, Doctor Abigail Griffin…The woman who shut down the COL is your mother?" asked the other boy with wide eyes.

"I don't want to talk about it okay ! So now hurry up, Maya is already waiting for us,"Clarke said dryly before opening suddenly the door.

The both women froze instantly.

"Mom, " Clarke breathed, stunned.

"Hi honey," Abby said back with an embarrassed smile.

Behind Clarke, the boys seemed to petrify and their faces turned red.

"Go ahead, I'll join you later," Clarke ordered them without stopping to stare at her mother.

The boys nodded, and left the room by staring at the floor. Abby shifted a little to let them pass and she heard them mumble some greeting. She offered them a nod while a slight smirk stretched her lips.

"What are you doing here?" Clarke asked her coldly.

"Can I come in?" Abby asked with a shy smile.

The girl nodded briefly and then took a step back.

"It's good to see you," Abby whispered tenderly, putting a hand on her daughter's cheek.

Abby hadn't seen her in nearly three months, in fact not since Christmas. Clarke had always been an independent child, she was able to spend a week with friends without thinking to call once, but over the years Abby felt like her own daughter had become a stranger.

"Why are you here?" Clarke asked again, pushing her mother's hand away.

Abby felt her heart break in her chest, but she tried to not show it.

"I was asked to come and help the BAU on a case," she confessed with shifty eyes.

"A case?" Clarke inquired with a suspicious tone.

Abby swallowed hard and cleared her throat.

"The sign of the COL has been found at a crime scene," she explained, looking up at her daughter.

A wince passed across Clarke's face.

"I see. And of course, you said yes," declaring the latter with a bitter smile.

"Clarke," Abby whispered, laying her hand on her daughter's forearm.

"I thought we were done with all of that," said Clarke in a reproachful tone, taking several steps backward.

"The COL, Jaha, all this shit! They shouldn't have called you! Not after…Anyway, I don't even know why I'm surprised," she added before passing a weary hand over her face.

Abby swallowed hard. She knew exactly what her daughter was speaking about. If the physical stigmata had disappeared over the years, the scars of her mind were still there…

* * *

 _Abby hardly opened her eyes. Her throat was dry and her body seemed paralyzed. Her head was so heavy that she couldn't even move it. Her memories were confused, inaccurate, totally disorientated. She was hot, so hot that it felt like her blood was boiling in her veins. Where was she? How did she end up here? She tried to speak, but the words were stuck in her throat. She blinked to accustom to the darkness which was saturating the room, in vain. She couldn't see anything, not even her own hands. Hands which, she realized at that moment, were tied together like her ankles. Her breathing was becoming more labored as panic crept into her. She wanted to scream. To call for help. Scream with all her strength, but her vocal cords no longer responded her. The beating of her heart was accelerated frantically in her chest and she could hear it in her ears, it started to drive her crazy. She had to calm down. She had to find a way to regain control of herself if she wanted to find a way to escape. "_ Think about something good _," she told herself inwardly. It was what she always said to Clarke when the little girl awoke from a nightmare when the loss of her father became too unbearable when her own comforting words were not enough to appease her irrepressible tears. "_ Think about something good _," she repeated quietly. "_ Think about Clarke ! Think about her smile! Think about her little body snuggled against yours! Think about your daughter _,". Gradually, Abby felt her muscles relax and her heart started to beat less frantically. Her thoughts became more clear, more logic in her mind._

 _"I never wanted any of this," said suddenly a voice as a blinding light lit up the entire room._

* * *

"We still don't know if this murder is linked to the COL, but if that is the case, they will really need my help," Abby argued as she tried to push away those horrible memories from her mind.

"Please stop! We both know why you said yes," Clarke exclaimed, exasperated.

"What…..?" Abby asked, frowning.

"You promised me to leave all of this behind us! You promised me that once your book was published, you would draw a line under all of this! And yet, you're here," said Clarke before shaking her head as if she was blaming herself for having trusted her.

"Clarke," Abby whispered, taking a step toward her daughter.

"I'm not stupid! I know where you were six years ago! I know who you were working with! Do you really think I don't know what you're hiding in that box under your bed? You know, the one where you keep you and dad's wedding rings," spat the girl, looking at her mother right in the eyes.

The criminologist remained speechless for some seconds.

"I–," she began but failed to find a satisfactory answer.

"No! Forget about it! It's not my business! I shouldn't have said that. Anyway, I don't have time for this, I have to go! "Clarke said, turning around to grab her bag.

"Clarke wait, "Abby pleaded by catching her daughter's wrist.

"Can we eat together tomorrow?" she asked softly.

Clarke stared at her a moment and then shook her head.

"I can't tomorrow," the girl replied coldly.

"When you get a free moment," Abby insisted with a sad smile.

"I'll call you. Please close the door behind you, "Clarke whispered before leaving the room.

Abby watched her walking away with a heavy heart. She remained motionless, her eyes suddenly filled with tears, until the girl disappeared around the corner. In one day, she had managed to reopen wounds which had never really been healed. Marcus, Clarke … Two of the most important people in her life hated her and she couldn't even blame them for it. They had every reason to hate her.


End file.
